Trunk Or Treat Events: A Step By Step Guide

It is that time of year for church groups everywhere to have local Trunk or Treat parties. Although I've lived in 15 different places for Halloween in my lifetime, our local church group in every one of them has had a Halloween party and every one of them called it "Trunk or Treat." If you've never been part of one before, here's the way this mysterious pre-Halloween event works:

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Moving On

It's been an enjoyable few months writing posts on this blog, but I've decided this will be the last on this blog. I enjoy writing, and I could probably do it all day. But there are other priorities I've decided to dedicate more time to in an attempt to simplify my life a little and focus on the things that are most important.

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Shattering the Scale

As I stepped on our bathroom scale yesterday for a daily (or more often) check-in, it literally broke. Broke as in cracked, shattered-inside, busted. The irony is my family has been doing a "Biggest Loser" contest and I was checking in to see how I was doing. I had to laugh out loud -- not many people can say they have broken their scale in the midst of a dieting program.

I have been trying to decide what the message is my scale was trying to send me. I think it could be any one of the following:

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Someone Knew

A few weeks ago, I did something I regretted as soon as I offered. I heard our company needed to deliver some boxes to another location in Phoenix, and I offered to take them because I had a scheduled meeting there a few days later. 

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Electronic Idol

While we waited in a 20-minute line at the entrance to Disneyland last month with my family, I noticed a father with his wife and two young kids in the line next to us. He was working on his cell phone while they waited. The kids looked excited and, like most others, were busy playing with each other, laughing, and doing the things kids do. Without looking up from his PDA, the father would periodically call out "stop that," "hold still," or other prompts to his children. After about 10 minutes of doing this, he had enough and let them have it. This time, he put down his phone, grabbed them by the shoulder, and said "we are at Disneyland, the happiest place on earth, and you are acting terrible. I want you to stop it right now and act appropriately." Then he went back to work on his phone

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Making a Difference

I was driving through our neighborhood the other day, in a hurry, and felt particularly annoyed by the speed humps on the road between my house and the local elementary school. Then I remembered how they got there.

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Throw Me an Inner tube

Back to the penguins on my shower curtain...one of the most curious of the bunch was floating in an inner-tube. Sure, it was cute, but what was it doing in an inner tube? Now, me in an inner tube would make a lot of sense...I might sink (I know they say fat floats, but for some reason I am quite capable of sinking). But a penguin can swim like

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10 Things I Never Wanted to Know About You

When I was entering college, I didn't even know what the Internet was (apparently, Al Gore hadn't done a good enough job yet of advertising his invention :). I remember sitting in the University library trying to navigate my first Web page, telling my soon-to-be wife, "this thing will never catch on." It was too slow, cumbersome, and difficult to find things.

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High Security

I understand the need for security in many important places -- like airports, court rooms, and banks. I might even understand if you wanted to put security around a really good donught shop, because we've got to protect our country's most important assets. But one place I had never really considered to be all that high of a security need is a hospital.

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Because

It is not only a great Beatles song, but it is probably the best answer to nearly every question that involves the word why.

Parents have long tried to find the right answers for the never-ending inquiries posed by their children. "Why do we have to do chores?" "Why is the sky blue?" "Why does Jimmy get five gifts from Santa at Christmas every year when we only get one?"

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Camping, Swimming or Dogs -- Part II

Whoever invented swimming obviously did not think it through all the way. I'm sure the intentions were noble, but they might as well have said, lets find a medium (water) to rinse off all the grossest parts of the human body (the nose, the armpits, the grease in the hair, the mouth...I'll stop there) and put it in a big bowl. Then pack it full of lots of people, all of whose bodies are being similarly "rinsed off'", and let everyone soak it in together.

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Camping, Swimming or Dogs -- Part I

I grew up with a father who despises all three: camping, swimming and dogs. Being the oldest, I think these same preferences were imprinted upon me at birth (along with some other characteristics of my father, such as legs that refuse to tan no matter how much sunlight they see). Of course, being repulsed by camping, swimming and dogs makes you unpopular with nearly anyone who likes to do anything fun, so I have spent much of my life attempting to psychoanalyze the root causes of these dislikes and even trying to learn how to like each of them. Thus far I haven't been very successful, and this is my attempt to explain why. I think you will see how normal I am.

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Vacation...Oh, Really?

First of all, I looked up the definition of vacation in the Family Dictionary (you know, the one that tells how words mean different things in large families than in other contexts). Nowhere to be found were the words relax, fun or invigorating. Instead, it read like this:

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Snorkeling Penguins...

Cute little penguins floating on innertubes, wearing snorkeling gear. That is just weird, yet it is what appeared on the towels, shower curtain and other decor in our downstairs bathroom a few weeks ago.

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